All She Ever Wanted
by Gwendolyn James
Summary: She had tried to convince herself that she wasn’t in love with him, but soon it invaded every part of her until she could hardly take a breath under the sheer pressure of it. She would love him until the day she died. Oneshot.


Disclaimer: If Ron were up for sale, I'd snag him in a heartbeat. Back off, teenyboppers.

A/N: This one is dedicated to a faithful reviewer, HighVoltage, who always leaves encouraging reviews and who challenged me (perhaps unknowingly) to break out of my mold and let Hermione kick some butt in the midst of the fluff. This one's for you. Thanks.

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Hermione entered the Great Hall with mixed emotions. Today was the most important day of her life to date, but it was also the saddest. In a few hours, she would be a Hogwarts graduate, and her life would change forever. No more Head Girl badge, no more late-night study sessions with Harry and Ron, and no more Gryffindor parties after a match. Instead, she would be entering another phase of her life as she started her new career. 

No doubt about it – she was excited. It was a chance to really show the world what she could do. A chance to make a difference. It was all she wanted and more.

Well, maybe not _all_ she wanted.

She took a seat beside Harry. He and Ron were engrossed in conversation and merely nodded to acknowledge her presence. She poured herself a glass of water and blocked their voices out of her mind.

She would miss them after today. Sure, they would see each other, but it wouldn't be the same. Harry had chosen to begin Auror training almost immediately, so he would be extremely busy from now on. Ron had decided that he'd had enough schooling and jumped at the chance to play professional Quidditch with the Cannons. He was beyond happy – it was all he could talk about.

Hermione had naturally had loads of options. The Ministry had practically begged her to join their Department for Muggle Relations. Madam Pomfrey had recommended her for the Healer program at St. Mungo's. She'd even been given the chance to take S.P.E.W. public. But in the end, she had taken Dumbledore's offer to become the new Charms professor at Hogwarts. Professor Flitwick was ready to retire and Hermione would be taking over his position after the summer holiday. It was her dream job - what more could she ask for?

Only one thing more.

"Even as a reserve Keeper I'll be seeing some action," Ron was saying. "I'll obviously be practicing as Keeper, and I'll play in the matches when Carrigan can't. Everyone says he's past his prime anyway. It'll only be a matter of time before he retires and I'm the primary Keeper."

Hermione felt her heart clench. She had always given Ron a hard time about putting Quidditch before his schoolwork, but in all honesty, she was proud of him. He loved what he was doing and he was good at it. In _her_ opinion, Carrigan should be moved into reserve so Ron could take his place.

It was a completely _unbiased_ opinion, of course – not at all colored by her feelings. Not at all.

Seeing as Ron was still talking about Carrigan and the Cannons, Hermione took the opportunity to watch him. He had grown up a lot since she first met him. No longer a gangly, awkward boy, Ronald Weasley had filled out and shot up, and now he was the man that all the girls swooned over. It made Hermione sick.

Mostly because she refused to be the swooning type, but also because a tiny part of her secretly _wanted_ to be the swooning type – just a little bit.

Luckily for her, Ron was completely oblivious to the affect he had on the female population. And just as unluckily, Ron was completely oblivious to the affect he had on _her_.

Merlin knew it would have been so much easier if she could have fallen in love with Harry instead. Simpler. More convenient. But Harry wasn't the one who made her heart race. Harry wasn't the one who made her so angry that she wanted to hit him and so happy that she wanted to kiss him. Harry wasn't the one who kept her awake at night, dreaming about what could be.

No, Ron was the one, and Hermione couldn't do a thing about it.

She had _tried_ to convince herself that she wasn't in love with him. Denial had worked at first, but soon the stifled love invaded every part of her until she could hardly take a breath under the sheer pressure of it upon her heart.

She loved Ronald Weasley with her whole being, and she would love him till the day she died.

"Hermione? What's wrong?

She started, realizing she'd been staring at him, and tried to compose a reply. "Nothing's wrong. I… I was just thinking."

Ron shrugged and resumed his dissertation on the finer points of the Cannons' defense. Hermione sighed and turned away. She suddenly wasn't hungry anymore. She got up and left the Great Hall, ignoring the odd looks she was surely getting from Harry and Ron. Why couldn't she just tell him the truth? "Yes, Ron, something _is_ wrong. I'm in love with you and you haven't got a clue!"

She was experiencing a level of frustration that was far beyond anything she'd ever experienced before. How could he not know that she was in love with him? She'd given up on subtlety ages ago, resorting to dropping clues at every opportunity, and he was _still_ in the dark! Merlin, even _Harry_ knew how she felt about Ron, and he'd been dropping hints as well! How was it possible that Ron didn't know?

Unless he _did_ know, and he didn't feel the same.

The thought nauseated her, and she felt tears prick her eyes. Maybe that was it. Maybe Ron knew that she loved him but didn't want to hurt her feelings. Good gods, how embarrassing. There was no way to save face now. It was far too late for that.

She turned a corner and ran into Ginny, who took one look at her face and pulled Hermione into an empty classroom.

"What's wrong? Is it Ron again?"

Hermione sighed. "Yes and no." How on earth could she explain this? "Ginny, does Ron know how I feel about him?"

Ginny's eyes widened. "Of course he knows! He asked me straight out one day and I told him."

Hermione put her hand over her eyes with a groan.

Ginny frowned. "Hermione, I thought you _wanted_ him to know. You've certainly given him enough hints that he should by now!"

"I know!" Hermione said miserably. "But he _knows_ and he hasn't _done_ anything! Obviously he doesn't feel the same. He doesn't want me, Ginny," she choked. Laughter met her ears. "What is so funny about this?" she asked, perturbed.

Ginny tried to catch her breath. "Hermione," she said in a patronizing tone, "it's not that Ron doesn't want you – he's been in love with you for years! The fact of the matter is, he hasn't done anything because he's a bloody coward!"

Hermione felt as though all the air had been squeezed out of her body. "Are you… sure?" she gasped, unable to take her friend's words as truth. Was it really possible?

"Of course I'm sure," Ginny replied, patting Hermione's shoulder. "I've known Ron for years," she said gently, "and I know what he's feeling even better than _he_ does sometimes. He loves you, Hermione, but he's scared to death that he won't be good enough for you." She smiled encouragingly. "He just needs a little push in the right direction."

Hermione sat in silence for a long time after Ginny left her. Ron loved her? He really loved her the same way she loved him? Could it really be that all of her dreams were finally within reach?

Well, they certainly _wouldn't_ be if she didn't get up and do something about it. This was her last chance – she wasn't about to let it pass her by.

She was determined to talk to Ron as soon as possible – the only trouble was finding him. He wasn't in the Great Hall – breakfast was apparently over. He wasn't out on the Quidditch Pitch either. She didn't even bother to check the library – he most definitely wouldn't be _there_. By the time she found him in the Common Room, she had formed a speech in her mind and butterflies in her stomach. Could she really go through with this? Her very future hung in the balance – could she take control and shape her destiny?

As she approached him, the butterflies multiplied into a swarm. _Just do it, Hermione. Tell him what you came to say and let him make the next move._ "Ron, may I have a word?"

He looked up in surprise. "Sure, Hermione. What is it?"

And then, looking up into his beautiful eyes, every word of her carefully planned speech flew out of her head. Robbed of her shield of words, Hermione Granger instead did the most courageous thing she had ever done before – she kissed Ronald Weasley.

The butterflies in her stomach swirled about in a lovely dance that made her feel dangerous and safe all at the same time. And when she pulled away, she saw her own dazed feelings reflected on his face.

Hermione, empowered by her unexpected actions, said the first thing that came to mind. "There's more where that came from if you want it." Then she turned and walked away, leaving a bewildered Ron staring after her in disbelief.

As soon as she got out of the portrait hole, Hermione put a hand to her mouth and let out a squeal. Had she _really_ just kissed Ronald Weasley? And then said…

"Oh, good gods," she whispered. "I can't believe I said that!" She released a shaky laugh and then headed toward the library. If Ron wanted to find her, he would have to work for it!

Twenty minutes later, Hermione was still alone in the library and feeling quite angry with herself. _You idiot! What were you thinking? You can't just go around kissing boys in front of the entire Common Room! You probably embarrassed him to death! He'll probably never speak to you again after that!_

She slammed her book shut and fought against the angry tears. It was entirely his fault anyway. _If the stupid prat had just told me how he felt in the first place, we wouldn't have to go through all this!_ She could feel her face turning red. Seven years she'd been waiting for him! Seven years! Well, she was tired of waiting for bloody Ron to make a move. She'd done her part! And where was _he_? Probably off playing Quidditch! He mostly likely had forgotten about the kiss as well!

Well, that just wouldn't do. Hermione quickly shoved her books back onto the shelves and stormed out of the library, muttering angrily under her breath. By the time she ran into Ron in the corridors, she was in quite a snit.

"Hermione, listen, I…"

"No, Ron, _you_ listen," she interrupted. "I've been waiting _years_ for you, and I'm not going to wait any more!" She was nearly shouting by now and quite aware of the stares they were attracting from passersby, but she honestly didn't care. Her breath was uneven and those stupid butterflies were at it again, but she had to say it. "I love you, Ronald Bilius Weasley, and I don't care who knows it!" She threw her hands up in frustration. "I love you and I know you love me as well! You can say it's all in my imagination, but I know it's the truth. We're supposed to be together, Ron – I believe it in my heart – but what happens next is up to you."

Ron stood there in obvious shock. His jaw moved back and forth but no words were formed. He just kept looking at her until finally she could stand it no longer.

"Say something," she demanded quietly. "Please, Ron, say _anything_." She was now painfully aware of the crowd that had gathered to witness the spectacle, and even more aware of Ron's silence in the face of her declaration.

Finally he spoke. "How did you know?" he whispered. "How did you know that I love you?"

"I didn't know," she confessed. "But I hoped."

His face broke into a grin. "I _do_ love you, you know."

She smiled back. "I love you, too."

They stood there grinning like idiots until a shout pulled them from their reverie.

"Come on, Weasley! Kiss her!"

Laughter rang out from their classmates and Ron blushed to the roots of his hair. Then he grinned sheepishly and asked, "May I?"

She laughed. "I thought you'd never ask."

As their lips met for the second time that day, the music in her heart drowned out the cheering in the corridors.

**FIN**

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A/N: Hoorah for Empowered!Hermione! Just goes to show that you never know what a desperate girl will do when Prince Charming is being a git. ;) Review already!  



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